Forgiveness can be one courageous act to undertake. The Soul can unconsciously hold hidden and secret faults. One of such is unforgiveness. So, it requires digging deeper from our spirit to discover this. When found we can release ourselves and others from the offences done to us.

Hurt, pain, and disappointment impact our minds first, when held on to this can sit in our soul, where it grows into different forms of emotions – anger, resentment, bitterness, and share pain. This also can present as physical pain.

Sometimes we are not aware that we hold in our souls’ secret hurts and faults as they can build up and hinder the complete flourishing of body, soul, and Spirit. Sometimes a sneak preview of this can be seen in an over emotional reaction to a minor incident.

I found that as a widow, unforgiveness presented itself in another format. As I always understood forgiveness as letting go of offence done by another to self. Especially when the person has asked for forgiveness and is clearly remorseful.

However, in a discussion group on forgiveness I was compelled spiritually to voice openly that I had forgiven my late husband. After this, I had to explore through personal reflection and quiet thoughts/time what this really meant.

I discovered I had held unconsciously some level of unforgiveness in my soul due to my late spouse leaving me on my own to navigate the world, with our children. This required a period of personal introspection. As I had to understand why such unforgiveness was held.

Unforgiveness in widowhood can come from the loss of all the dreams and hopes shared with a spouse. Death leaves in its wake an impression of the other person not holding up their side of the commitment.

 It also leaves one wondering in the wilderness of forced singleness with the love of your life absent. I felt that on the day I took my marital vows I did not sign up for his passing so early. In the first year of loss at least one’s emotions are magnified.

 It may sound irrational, but when were emotions solely rational? This is where the need to forgive is applicable. Self-awareness allowed me to consciously let go of unforgiveness, by verbal confession. Equally arriving at a rational acceptance that death comes, and it is not anyone’s fault.

So, faith teaches us to ‘Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other’, including self.

Forgiveness guarantees at least three spiritual benefits

1.Freedom from being tied in knots rather the wellness to just be.

2.Freedom from the oppression of the past

3.Freedom to accept a new future.

If you are struggling to forgive today, you may find the courage and strength to release yourself from its clutches and adverse effects.

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